Overwork and Me: My Work Ethic Explained
When people find out how much I work, and how little leisure time and sleep I get, they’re shocked. Here, I explain my attitude to work, and how a part of my brain is wired.
JOHN NICHOLS
JANUARY 22, 2021
As I write this, I’m very tired.
I’ve slept for less than twelve hours total across the last three days.
Because I want to squeeze every hour out of every day.
When people find this out.
Friends.
Colleagues.
They think I’m crazy.
That I’m making myself ill.
That I’ll regret it in years to come.
To me, every hour is an opportunity.
If I sleep early.
Before midnight at the very earliest.
I’m wasting time.
If I’m watching TV.
I’m wasting time.
If I’m eating.
I’m wasting time.
That’s why I only watch the news whilst I’m exercising.
And why I always eat at my desk.
Overwork.
They say overwork is bad for you.
Bad for your mind.
Bad for your body.
But it’s not something I’ve fallen into.
It’s a decision I’ve taken.
To help me get where I want to go.
To become who I want to become.
One wish.
If a genie granted me one wish.
I’d ask for more hours in the day.
Maybe then I could accomplish everything I want.
Maybe then I could learn all the things I want to learn.
And be satisfied.
Or maybe not.
Maybe I would keep working.
And keep working.
And I’d yearn to wish for even more hours in the day.
A second wish.
So if I could be granted a second wish.
I’d want today to never end.
That way I don’t have worry about commitments.
I don’t have to worry about what’s coming up.
I can just work.
But.
I’m still limited.
Limited by my brain.
By how tired I am.
A third wish.
So if I could be granted a third wish.
I’d like to never get tired.
That way I don’t have to stop.
I don’t need to sleep.
Or take a break.
I could stay awake and work perpetually.
Until I was finally satisfied.
The truth.
But.
I never will be.
I’ll never be satisfied.
I know that.
You know the saying; “The joy is in the journey, not the destination”?
That.
Perhaps this is a crazy affliction.
But it’s one I’m glad to burden.
Maybe that makes me a masochist.
But I don’t know any other way.
And I’m fine with that.
I feel well enough.
Both in mind and body.
To do this.
To squeeze as much as I can.
Out of every hour.
Of every day.
My work ethic.
Am I crazy?
Am I making myself ill?
Will I regret it in years to come?
No.
Absolutely not.
In fact, it’s the opposite.
I relish in it.
I’d regret it if I didn’t do this.
If I didn’t exploit my youth whilst I can.
What kind of life is this?
Mine.
And I’m happy with that.
Published January 22, 2021. Cover photo by Joshua Davis on Unsplash.
P.S. If you know which EP inspired the cover art, drop me a message.